Dead without you

Would it make sense if I beg you to stay?
Would it change a thing?
You clearly don't think I am good enough
You clearly don't want to do anything for me
So why should I try?
Why should I fight?
Cause my love is bigger?
But what about YOUR love?
You said “forever”
You said “I'll never leave you”
And I believed you
I was so stupid and naive that I believed you
And now I'm here, lying on my bed,
moping and screaming and shouting and crying
begging you not to leave me
Begging and pleading,
knowing it's for nothing
Cause you said such horrible things
I'll never be able to forget again
That it has never been worthy
That it has never been good
When some hours ago you were telling me
that I am amazing and beautiful
Now you say that it'll never work out
that it never has
and it's the first time you admit it
After so many months... 10 months..
isn't it enough?
I've been fighting and crying and begging and pleading
and you never did anything like this
And now you say that it'll never work out?
Ironic,isn't it?
The one who should beg is cold as ice
The one who should end it is moping around
Forgetting my pride and crawling behind
When I should be the one who say you're not good enough
You see how not fair it is
But you don't do anything to make it right
You know how it hurts
And you still don't care
You never showed me 
if you really loved me
You never fought for me
And now...
You don't want me
Anymore
So I'll have to survive it
I'll have to stand up
after that you kicked me
down again
after you broke me
and never hold me
and won't ever help me
be myself again
All the dreams and hopes
All the planned future
goes to hell with your words
that it's not going to work
You won't even try 
to make it a better thing
You won't even change yourself
for me
And now I'm supposed
to believe that you love me?
That you loved me once before?
Before you ended it?
Forgive me if I don't
If I'm not that naive
Forgive me if I don't forget
those words that you said
Forgive me if I don't feel like
living this life all over again
Forgive if I don't want to
trust someone again
Cause after you did me
I don't want to fall again
You made me fall,you dumped me
and kicked me, smashed my heart to pieces
and ripped me apart
So forgive me if I can't forget all that you did
All that you said
Cause I'm not a strong person 
I am so weak
You know all my deepest secrets
and my weakest points
You know me better
than I know myself
And I gave you all
I gave you everything
And your answer to all this
you dump me and break me
I gave you more than I could
I gave you more than you can imagine
I gave you everything
Everything that I had
My heart, my body, my soul
All my dreams and future
And you show me your gratitude
by throwing me away
So now I've got nothing else
No family,no friends,
no one I can trust
No one.
Not even you.

Dying On The Inside

My heart is beating
My heart is pleading
To be saved
Its going bad
It's going mad
It need help now
Before it sops making a sound
It's yelling and yelling
It's swelling and swelling
But when it screams 
No one ever hears
They are just standing there
They just stare
It's breaking and breaking
Every things shaking
I then feel a pain
Something that feels like a chain
Suffocating me
It rips through my soul
It's making holes
Then it gets to my heart
And starts tearing it apart
Then it crumbles
And tumbles 
Down a dark hole
I then lose myself
And am forced to live in the shadow
Of someone else

GOODBYE

Goodbye my love why did god take you away?
Why my love did you have to take your life
Why didn't I try to contact you sooner
Why couldn't it be my arms wrapped around your neck
and not a nose
Why wasn't I not there to comfort you
I need to feel your touch
 I need to taste your sweet lips
instead of bitter salty tears 
I need to hear you say you love me
When your mother told me  you died that terrible night I was devastated
I miss you baby 
you haunt me till this day
Why couldn't it be me and not you
You were doing better anyway
If I could die and it would bring you back i would do it happily
but I can't so I am saying my goodbyes
Goodbye hour long phone calls
Goodbye carelessly sweet kisses
Goodbye my other half
Goodbye.......I can't do this
I can't live without him!
I'm coming my love
to everybody else..........
Goodbye!!

BROKEN

My love for you has died out. 
The pain it causes for me puts a hole through my chest,
as if there was nothing there to begin with. 
When you cut me open, 
I never thought I would bleed. 
Just take me, 
and shut me out. 
Just don't break me, 
because I am broken enough.

You once said you loved me,
But that all soon changed.
Once you knew I was different,
You disowned me. 
Destroyed me.
Hated me.

Now I cry tears of crimson
that stain my carpet of sadness and pain.
I'm not that strong willed.
I can't smile while hurt.
All of you that I have now,
Is the imprint of your hatred
Upon my heart.

Forever incomplete

When we swore to never be apart
I never knew that it was just me
You are still in my heart and soul
You have my whole heart
I'll forever be just a half waiting to be whole
My love in vain
You don't even understand this pain
Without you it's like
The day without sun
Rain without clouds
A kid without parents
A pool without water
A rainbow without color
Thunder without lightning
A laugh without a smile
Family with no love
Night without the moon or stars
You are still whole and happy
I'm forced to still love and miss you
There is still no words to describe it
Without you I'll always be incomplete

MY LOVE TILL END

You were my only happiness,
My one and only highness
I kept my secrets with you,
Cause I know you were true

Darkness came into me,
For only you I can only be
But darkness turned into darkest,
Cause you left me and have eternal rest

My tears fell down,
My heart was drown
You left without a warning,
You vanished in just a fling

Your laughter and smile,
I can't search it in an isle
Your brown eyes and well-formed nose,
I love and misses those

I know you're still with me,
Your love's within my heart
Though life is no longer present,
Our souls will never part

I know its not the last,
For time is evenly fast
So long for now my happiness,
Until we meet again my highness

Now I understand, finely like sand
Why you'd left and chose HIS land
For now, in heaven I want to send
MY LOVE for you TILL THE END.

ALONE

Everyday I'm waking up to find myself alone again,
To sing another painful song of joy,
Drifting through a day of lies,
Twisted words and painful sighs,
I keep myself locked away for good.

Every time I sing to you,
I always sing the wrong tune,
I wish that we could go back in time,

Happiness is what you were,
And I gave you my last curse,
You will never see the light again,

Can't we ever start again,
Back in time to where it began,
I dream of past every single day,

I don't know what I did to you,
But you broke my heart all the way through,
And yet you're still always by my side,

You thought that I would break your heart,
But I never ever looked apart,
Your eyes were always gleaming oh so bright,

And when the tears roll down my face,
Still I get a cold embrace,
Do you really love me at all.

HIDUPKU YG MALANG

hidup ni memang menyakitkan hati..asal aku x amti je ek.? baru x sakit hati..org yg aku sayang tinggalkan aku mcm 2 ja..hina sangat ka aku ni..aku taw la umo aku lagi muda dari dia..tapi knapa dia sanggup buat aku mcm ni..apa salah aku..AKU HARAP DAN BERDOA..,AGAR DIA AKN KEMBALI PADAKU PADA MASA AKN DATANG

HARI YG PALING SEDIH DALAM HIDUP.

Thanks sbb sudi hadir dalam hidup saya..saya sayang awak sangat2..sy minta maaf klu sy ada buat salah kat awak..tapi sy nk awak tahu ini..,sy sayangkan awak sepanjang hidup dy.,walaupun kita dh berpisah..,hati sy tetap milik awak..dan sy harap..,awak akn terima sy blik pada masa yg akn datang..,sy sayangkan awak slmanya..,dan klu sy sudah tiada..,sy harap awak akn jmpa org yg lebih baik dari sy..